Sunday, 23 February 2014

Poem - More Than You Appear

I know you
I see you
You are more than you appear


The world holds you back
Says you can't
Says you'll fail

And you believed them
You stopped trying
You gave up.


But I know you
And I see you
You are more than you appear

You are strong
You are gifted
You are so much more than what they say


People judged you harshly
They said you couldn't
Said you're broken

And you accepted it
You claimed the lie
You hid yourself


But I hear you
And I know you
You are more than what they say

You are brave
You are whole
You are so much more than the world believes


Strangers tear you down
They say you're weak
Say you'll fail

And it became your mask
You hid from the world
Hid from yourself


But I see you
And I hear you
You are more than you appear

You are powerful
You are worthy
You are so much more than what you see.

Poem - Pen And Paper

I don't understand this urge to write,
But it's there just the same
With the same compelling drive
As the need to own my name

It's a calming soothing release
As it strikes my edginess
It pours out all my anguish
And relieves me of my stress

Pen across paper, ink flowing free
Words take form beneath my hand
It soothes the soul, and clears the mind
Like a stroll across the sand

Pen and paper, my release
My escape from the day to day
Everything I see will change
I recreate, I mold like clay

I write what I feel and see
Words are my life, my soul
They'll show you what's inside
Broken, incomplete, or whole

You'll see the real, honest me
If you take the time to look
My words reveal all of me
Like a smoothly written book.

Saturday, 18 January 2014

Poem - Stay With Me

In honour of my parents' 37th anniversary earlier this month


Stay with me
I'll share my world with you
Alone, I'm out of step
Alone, my world's askew

So stay with me
Come watch the northern lights
Dance as the colours do
You make me feel so right

Stay with me
Fill my sky with stars
My life is so much better
If I'm where you are

So stay with me
Something's lost if you're away
You bring me joy and laughter
You bring the sun; please come and play

Poem - Everything Is Better

In honour of my parents' 37th anniversary earlier this month.


The way salt perfects a meal
Or the stars brighten the sky
The way honey sweetens tea
Or wings help birds to fly

Everything is better
With you by my side
Everything is better
when I've seen you smile
Everything is safer
When you have my back
Everything is better
You bring what I lack

The way I feel alive
Or the courage you bring out
The way you help me thrive
Or push through my every doubt.

Everything is better
With you in my arms
Everything is brighter
With the love found in your heart
Everything is safer
When you hold me tight
Everything is better
When I'm bathed in your light

Musing - Why I Reach For The Stars

"Why do I reach for the stars when I don't have wings to carry me that far?"
Roots Before Branches

Just to clarify, from the first time I heard Roots Before Branches, I loved the song. It reminds me to dream, that my dreams are worth chasing, that I can find a place where I belong. I feel empowered and hopeful every time I listen to it. But that one line has bugged me from the first. The singer poses a question; why do I reach for the stars, when I don't have wings to carry me that far?

In a song filled with hope, this one line doesn't seem to fit. I hear it and I feel like I'm longing for the impossible. I don't have wings to carry me to the stars. i don't have what I need to reach my dreams. So why do I try? I was left feeling almost guilty for striving for something I fear I don't have the skills to achieve. I felt like I was wasting time, mine and my families. I've spent months thinking about this question, trying to figure out why I can, and should, reach for the stars.

First, if I reach for the stars there's a chance I may fail to reach my goal. I may fall short. Yet, if I don't even try then my chance of failure becomes a certainty. "The only true failure is a failure to try." (unknown) I know that if I never take the first step, I will never walk the path I want to. If I don't write a single word, my story will never be told. So I try, because trying is the only chance I have. I reach for the stars because I will never dance among them if I don't step out and try.

Last week I mused about the journey and the destination, The Mountains Or The Stars. I mused about how it's the journey that changes you. This is a large part of why I reach for the stars. I may never be able to fly that far, but the attempt itself will change me. I will grow and strengthen myself by taking that first step and writing even just one word. And as I grow and gain strength, I may find that I do reach the stars. I may not have wings to carry myself that far now, but just watch me. I leap off that cliff and I'm carried on new wings. They are there when I need them, stronger than I realized, carrying me farther than I ever imagined.

The third reason is very simply. One of my favourite quotes is "Leap for the stars; if you miss you may still land on the moon." (unknown) So what if my wings don't carry me to the stars. I look around and I see the moon. I see beauty and love and achievement that I didn't think was possible a year ago. My path has changed a lot in the last year; I see a new goal. I'm not where I thought I would be. I am so far beyond what I expected of myself.  I'll reach for the stars because even if I don't end up dancing among them, I will end up in a place full of magic and beauty, a place where my dreams are reality.

So whatever your reasons are for reaching for the stars, don't let your lack of wings slow you. Don't fail to try. Take that first step on your path, write the first word of your story. You may develop the wings and strength you need to reach the stars, or you may find yourself on the moon. No matter what, so long as you reach and dream, you can find a way to make those dreams real.

Tuesday, 14 January 2014

Story - Magic Awakens - Part Four

"Why would a mob be after us?" Eric says, looking to the old man. I can feel my eyes drawn to Kyra and Anthony. The crowd was after them, and I wonder if they know why. Kyra meets my eyes and nods. She and I need to talk.

"Does it matter?" Malachi says in reply, "They are coming, and we need to leave before someone gets hurt."

The others move quickly to follow him, but I hesitate. Kyra moves up beside me, and I feel the same distrust in her. A quick glance between us, and we slowly follow the group.

We're a few steps behind the others when I hear a sound behind us. I can feel my blood begin to heat. The mob, or at least one or two of them are behind us. Kyra slips her hand into mind, and the sensation of a stormy sea slips inside me. Kyra is angry that the mob has come after us. She holds tighter to my hand and images slip inside my head.

Kyra woke much the way I did this morning, knowing something was different. I smile slightly as she searches the internet and turns on the radio. I remember the frustration at the realization that there is no news to be had, good or bad. She texts her mom and then heads out to work. The cafe where she works isn't far from my college, just on the other side of the park. In fact, Kyra walks past my college every day.

At work, Anthony was on edge, right from the moment he stepped in the door. He muttered to himself all morning, and none of the drinks he made came out right. Kyra had several customers complain that their drinks weren't the right temperature, and some even said they tasted salty.

I glance back at another sound behind us, the sound of a twig snapping. Kyra and I move faster, her hand still firmly clasping mine. A new memory pours into me; I see an iced drink begin to steam and then explode in Anthony's hand as the liquid begins to boil rapidly.

The shock on his face gives way to understanding. 'Magic,' he mutters under his breath.

'What's that, Anthony?' Kyra asks, walking up with a towel. He grabs her by the shoulders, almost shaking her.

'It's Magic, Kyra! That's what's changed. Magic is back, and the world is different now. I can feel it. You feel it too, Kyra; I know you do. Magic is back, and it's here. It's why the drinks won't behave.'

'That's crazy, Anthony,' Kyra begins, but Anthony just waves her off, one hand still grasping her shoulder.

'I know you feel it, Kyra. You know things have changed. Magic is back; you know I'm right.'

Before Kyra can respond, a nearby customer interrupts. His laughter is cruel and harsh. 'Ha! Magic doesn't exist, old man. You're delusional, and if the girl listens to you, she is just as crazy as you are.'

His buddy beside him chimes in. 'It'd be a real shame. She's quite the looker, but you can't date a crazy lady. It just ain't safe.'

'Ha! She doesn't have to be sane to take her to bed. Just willing,'

Steam begins to rise off every drink in the room. Kyra looks up to see a flash of anger storm through Anthony's eyes. The coffee in the customer's hand explodes, drenching him in boiling coffee. Then one by one, every drink in the cafe boils over. Steam billows out of countless cups, flooding the air. A dense fog suddenly fills the cafe.

I can hear the crowd shouting as their drinks foam and steam. I can't see them anymore though. The crowd is too think. The feel in the cafe quickly turns ugly. I grab onto Anthony's wrist and pull him into the back room by sheer memory.

'I'm sorry, Kyra; I didn't mean to. I just go so angry, I lost control. Not that I had that much to begin with.'

'Anthony, calm down. I can hear them coming, and they sound furious. We need to get out of here. Now.'

Images blur in my mind for a moment. Stacks of boxes and shelves blur with the trees around Kyra and I. Sunlight bursts over me, both in the memory and in real life as we move through a clearing. The memory becomes stronger now, and I let Kyra continue to guide me.

She and Anthony made it outside of the cafe into the back lot. They move quickly into the nearby park, but the mob follows them. A half empty cup of coffee slams into Anthony's back, drenching him.

He moves Kyra in front of him, urging her faster. He's trying to protect her, to shelter her as much as he can. They move through a slight dip in the ground, and the road moves out of sight. Kyra starts moving as fast as she can for the trees in the park, but before they can move a half a dozen steps, the crowd from the cafe surrounds them.

I know this is only a memory, but I can feel the anger and fear in the crowd. They're yelling at Anthony, offering insults and rude suggestions. Anthony just does his best to stay between them and Kyra, but it's futile. They're surrounded.

I feel Kyra's certainty that things are about to go very wrong, when she sees Eric and I break through the cover the trees provide. She knows us the same way we knew her. I feel hope break through her, like a wave crashing on the shore, and she grabs hold of Anthony's hand so he sees us too.

Kyra lets the memory slide then, and I blink quickly, reorienting myself. We've moved fast and our group is close to my college. I glance over at Kyra, grateful for the memories she's shared. I'll have to ask her about them soon, but for now I'm just glad to have some of my questions answered.

I have dozens more, but I doubt Kyra can answer many of them. We need to know who Malachi is, and what he wants. I don't trust him. He says he's just a guide, but that doesn't feel right. I think he's more, but even if he is what he says, what exactly is he guiding us to? What are his plans for us, and what does he get out of all this?

Kyra squeezes my hand again, and I know she shares my concerns. As soon as we get somewhere safe, we'll be asking our questions. I, for one, am not following anyone's guidance if I don't know where he wants to lead us.

Sunday, 12 January 2014

Poem - Fevered Mind

The world spins and takes me with it
Fear and hope war deep inside
Dreams and nightmares rage within
Crafted by a fevered mind.


No will to live, no wish to die
An empty void screams so loud
Desires lost but always mine
Silence found in a busy crowd


The world turns and turns my fate
Grief and joy, a violent explosion
A longing terror for constant change
No stagnation, no satisfaction


I wake, I dream, I crave my home
Restless exhaustion drags me down
I spin, I search, I seek my unknown
Yet held in place, no future found